Saturday, June 11, 2011

some light at (not) the end of the tunnel...

As I've previously mentioned, I've been a little down lately, especially the last few days...until last night when I had a great talk with my hubby, that really cheered me up. I was actually planning on my next post being called "well at least I'm not dead yet"...and being all about how much worse of I would be if I were dead, so I shouldn't complain to much about my trials...ha ha..that's about all the good I could see at that time. 
My hubby....he is pretty much like a robot, a well-oiled and working incredibly logical, relatively unemotional and incredibly efficient robot. Things just don't bother him. Nothing bothers him. He doesn't need job fulfillment to be happy, he just enjoys life all the time, no matter what he's doing. When problems come up that bother me, they don't bother him at all, because he just thinks about them logically and knows they will go away sometime, so why worry
I wish I had that attitude. talking to him last night did give me a small dose of his attitude though, and I have been rejuvenated in my desire to try and stay calm, patient, and try and make my will in line with the Lord's
I know that all my desires are righteous, and that they are the desires that I am supposed to have right now...I just need to focus more on the timing....the timing needs to be in the Lords hands as well, and I need to be okay with that....more than okay with that. 
Once I figure this all out, and how to completely absolve my will to His, I think that all my trials will melt away....and I'll find that they weren't even trials to being with, just little tests for me. 
I hope that I can find ways to do this...and become more laid back in every way, like my amazing hubby is. He really is amazing...what would i do without him? I don't even know. So yes, I am glad I'm not dead yet, ha ha.

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